Lesson Learned

My son had to learn a life lesson the other day about money. One that we all eventually learn over and over again sometimes. There is this little boy who lives at the corner in this huge apartment building with his mom. He comes down to play with my son from time to time. This little boy is a year younger then my son but more street smart then my son and he knows it too. I try to cut off as much of the "bull" as I can but sometimes things happen and they have to learn. So, this particular day they were outside playing and they got the bright idea to ask permission to go to the corner store. I said it was ok, since we know the owners of the store pretty well and the store is about 3 minutes away walking distance. My son collects his $3 that he had from his allowance and off they go. They come back in the allotted time and the little boy is happily eating chips and holding on to an ice cream bar in the other hand. My son is drinking some lemonade he got in a can. All seems good between them.  They happily play for another 45 minutes until the boy's mom comes to pick him up and my son comes inside too. A little while later my son said that he spent all of his money at the store. I only saw him drinking one can of lemonade so I knew that was not possible if he spent his money only on his stuff. One can costs 75 cents not $3. Then he tells me that the little boy didn't have any money so he asked to borrow $2 telling my son that he was hungry and his mom was not home so he didn't' have anything to eat for hours and hours. I am not sure how true that was but I let him continue. So, my son said that he felt sorry for him and let him borrow $2 the boy said he would pay him back the next day. I really didn't believe it but held my tounge and gave him the benefit of the doubt.

So, the next day came and went and no little boy. He didn't see that little boy for a week and when he did that same little boy was walking from the store with another little boy holding on to some chips and a soda. My son asked him when was he going to pay him back. The little boy just looked like my son was speaking a language which he couldn't understand and sort of shook his head and kept walking. The boy he was walking with said that their friend just borrowed money from him too. I told my now upset and confused son that sometimes people will borrow money from you with no intention of paying you back it is just a part of life. A cruel part of life that we all had to learn. You can't lend money to everyone.

My son was not happy but he understood that he learned a lesson that day. He still plays with that little boy from time to time but he will never loan him money again he says. He says the next time he is hungry he will just make him a sandwich and feed him. I think he made the right decision.

Hawk Mom

My son loves playing outside. When I tell him to come inside it is like I am telling him to walk the plank or something. I do understand his love of the outdoors though. Way back when in the late 70's and 80's I had that same love for the outside. I would stay outside all day in the summer time with my sister and cousins. I think that my mom preferred it that way most of the time and so did my aunt. But, when it was time to come in it was just time and nobody liked it but nobody did any pouting or  moping around or mumbling certain words that we weren't allowed to say under our collective breaths. We did as we were told. When those street lights came on we better be in the house ten seconds later. We knew that if we didn't that we would be in big trouble and not be allowed to go out and play the next day. Those were the days.

Flash forward to about 30 years later. Now, it is my son's turn to play outside with the neighborhood kids. But, it is a whole lot different. I have to almost shadow his every move, almost. I tell him that he has to stay in front of the house where I can see him and he can see me if I go out to the front porch and he definitely has to stay in hearing and running distance to the house if he needs to run inside. Most of the kids he plays with have brothers, sisters, or cousins that kind of watch each other's back but he is an only child and really doesn't have that kind of support and is not really close to any of them to be treated like kin folks. So, therefore I am a little too protective sometimes with his outside activities. The neighbors aren't like the neighbors that I grew up with. When I grew up they all looked out for you. If you were doing something that you weren't supposed to they told on you and you got in trouble. Now, these neighbors could actually care less unless you bump their car playing ball accidently, or you are a little too loud when they are trying to read inside their homes or you are disturbing them in another way then they might look out of their collective doors to tell you to be more quiet and even that is a long shot and doesn't happen too often. Around here to each their own. It saddens me to a point to see this. I am more old school I guess. If I see a child doing something that is wrong I will tell him and tell his parents. The parents don't seem to mind me telling them but neither are they anywhere in sight when their kids are all over the neighborhood  for hours at a time.

So, I went to check on my son as I do like every 5-10 minutes just to check to see what he is doing and whom he is doing it with so his friend says to him, "Oh there's your mom AGAIN." and he made a face like he was going to faint. I just smiled and said, "Yes it is me again and I will be back again, and again and again if that is what it takes to keep you all safe."  The look on his face was a Kodak moment. I don't think he expected that answer. Nor did I expect to give him one. I guess one of the drawbacks of apartment living is that since there is no backyard or front yard that it makes it harder to play where you are supposed to play. But, nothing I can really do about that right now but tell him where he can and can't play and watch him like a hawk. Some day he might thank me for it. Maybe. Or at least tell his children how granny was when he was 9 when they are 9.

Party Planning

I have never been a big birthday celebration person. Sure I like the cake, ice cream and even blowing out the candles. But, parties have never really been my thing. I had one big birthday party at my grandmother's house when I was either 7 or 8. That was it. My grandmother would have loved if I had big parties every year at her house. She loved everything about parties. If she hadn't become a nurse she probably would have been one awesome party planner. I guess I am not big on parties partly because my mom wasn't either. 

I didn't think my son would want enormous birthday parties either and for 9 years he really didn't. But, this year all that changed for his 10 th  birthday coming up in December. I have a huge headache just thinking about it. He wants all of his newly friended neighborhood kids. There are two whom live directly across the street. And the rest live down the block he just met a couple weeks ago. I am not sure if any of them 
Would come since when he asked the two across street one immediately chimed in and said they can't come they have football practice without even knowing any other details. I chalked it up to kids being kids. But, I remember when I was a kid and someone said birthday party with free cake, ice cream, and goody bags I was begging my mom to go. I guess times and even kids have changed. They don't get excited about simple backyard parties anymore. In this case a parking lot party since we don't have a backyard or a bigger place. I was hoping by this time we would but life had other ideas. I just do the best I can.

So, anyway, in late November I will set out on the task of putting the finishing touches on a party that I apparently need to start planning today. I just hope it doesn't rain.

Wise Words

When I was pregnant with my son this older lady about my mom's age told me having kids when you are older is great except for one thing that you won't have the energy as they get older and you go through " the change" as she put it. That was something I never thought of. I  was just happy to be having a baby.  
I began to think about it that day. Then I shook my head and said no that won't be me. Little did I know a few years later probably around the time my son turned five. My energy was leaving me faster than I could count to ten. I said to myself out loud this was ridiculous. So, then just as I was attempting to get myself in better shape or some shape period menopause crept up or peri menopause as they called it snuck up out of nowhere. My energy level quickly went to none. But I was determined not to let this get the better of me. I changed my diet, got more excerise and was on the road back to me. 

Today, I still have a lot of work to do and occasionally I think about that conversation many moons ago with that wise woman.